“Sometimes when I look at you,
I feel I’m gazing at a distant star.
but the light is from tens of thousands of years ago.
Maybe the star doesn’t even exist any more.
Yet sometimes that light seems more real to me than anything.”
― Haruki Murakami,
I came across this quote today and my mind wandered off to a place that never existed.
In all these days a lot has changed, you, me and all the things around us but what has not changed is the hopeless longing for your presence that has accompanied me every moment that I have ever spent.
Your indifference has not made a difference rather it made our bond stronger just like the wind blows away the small fire but inflames the greater ones.
I don’t want you anymore; the unbeknownst affinity that I possess towards your coldness is what completes it all.
Absence intensifies love, all I have now is a firm sense of gratification fuelled with trust. I trust my love, not for you but for the memories that have a part of you in them.
I am homesick for a place that I never actually want to cherish.
What wrenched my heart was the feeling of not having something that I wanted and now an unlike yet similar thought surrounds my heart that longs for you and is still fulfilled to not have you.
And I sit here all alone romanticizing about a person that you never were, craving for the love that I never got and recollecting the things you never said.